Thursday, January 24, 2008

A fundamental right

At work I tend to be pondering topics of interest while I work. One benefit of mostly manual (mind numbing?) labor is this opportunity to day dream and consider/reconsider topics and arguments. Today I was thinking about a few things, Superbad being one and a post I shall probably have to write in the near future. Another was an idea for a series of posts, there are a number of labels which I ascribe to myself, and I was thinking it would be interesting to describe the whys of each one as I did with "sex positive."

But the thing I wanted to share with you all was this. I was thinking about the Roe V. Wade anniversary and the inevitable abortion debate that follows. For some reason the "if you don't want to have kids, don't have sex" argument popped into my head, and I rolled my eyes as I always do. I thought to myself "that's just not reasonable." But then I thought...


Why is that not reasonable?

Why is it not reasonable to expect people to refrain from sex unless they are willing and/or able to bear and raise children?

In our still largely Christian culture, we can't discount the influence of Christian thought, and I think this is one example where it is still strong. Because most people don't come back readily with an argument against this idea.

But I did, today.

This is an unreasonable expectation because human beings are (for the most part) sexual beings. Our sexuality (or asexuality) is integral to our identities and experiences as human beings. And we have an inalienable right to experience our sexuality fully. An inalienable right to express that sexuality with partners or ourselves as we see fit.

It is our RIGHT. Our BIRTHRIGHT. Sex and sexuality is a part of being human. And it is separate from the desire some of us have to procreate. The fulfillment in experiencing our sexuality is independent of procreation.

Some of us will never want to have children. That is absolutely no reason for us not to experience our birthright too.


  1. Humans having sex for fun is supposed to be one of the things that separates us from the animals right?

  2. while i really want to agree with you (because sex is, and should be, fun!), i feel very strongly about taking responsibility for one's own actions. as in, sex can lead to babies. this is something people need to know, and they need to know that even if you're careful, there is still a chance - because you need to know what you are getting into. on the other hand, everything has consequences, and there is a point in anything where the likelihood is small enough that it isn't going to stop you. it's just that, in this case, the consequence is pretty serious, so i'd say that chance needs to be really damn small.

    arguing with myself, though: if we could properly teach people about all of the methods of birth control (and make them attainable), then this wouldn't be an issue in the first place, because there are ways that are really fucking close to completely successful, not to mention plan b (which is a whole different argument, i know).

    of course, my first thought in response to "if you don't want to have kids, don't have sex" is "okay!" because i don't want kids, but having sex with women is up there with abstinence as a successful birth control =D

  3. And it's more complicated for people who's belief structures forbid things like contraception and abortion. The situation for women who do find themselves unwillingly pregnant is another topic.

    But this fundamental right, doesn't change.

    I'm pretty certain that I never want to have children. That doesn't mean I'm going to stop having sex with my husband. It means I'm going to use contraceptives to prevent pregnancy. And sexuality should not be used as an excuse not to use safer sex practices. I am absolutely strongly for comprehensive sex education. In fact I think access to it is a fundamental educational right.

  4. Also, some people can't have children. Should they have more sex, or less? :)


whatsername reserves the right to delete your comment if you choose to act like an asshole, so please engage respectfully